An initial meeting with a stranger, a chat, commonalities, a loose bond, an acquaintance, and eventually a friend.

As an adult these steps are difficult. We are no longer forced into social contact with strangers through school or university, and we do not want to rely on work colleagues for socialising. How does a grown up make friends?

In the past it has been through courses or hobbies [the Internet counts, right?], or friends of friends, all recent arrivals in a strange land. Now I am in an even stranger land, with different cultures and languages. Alcohol is not readily available to break the ice, and socialising is often done through private dinner parties.

As a woman at a bar you are likely to be hit on by men wanting more than a chat, and it’s genuinely difficult to form platonic relationships when the male to female ratio is so skewed. This also means it’s difficult to make female friends, as there are so few in comparison. A large proportion of women are mothers, meaning they socialise in a different circle.

Many people are only in Doha for a short period of time, 6 months to 1 year, and it would be easy to slip into that mindset “I’m only here for a year, why should I bother?”. You have to force yourself.

We’re on the lookout for interesting courses and hobbies, clubs and exercise options. Things we can do together. Activities we can do separately.

Because, as much as we love spending time with each other, Hubby and I cannot spend a year isolating ourselves.

Do you have suggestions of fun things we can try? How do you make new friends now you’re a ‘grown up’?

Advertisements